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What Parenting Plans Get Wrong About Changeovers

Most parenting plans account for holidays down to the hour, specifying who has the children on the Fourth of July, what time Christmas morning ends, and which parent handles school pickup on alternating Fridays. The transition itself, the moment a child physically moves from one home to the other, rarely appears. That gap has real consequences for children. The Transition Is a Relational Event Family law has long treated changeovers as logistics. Who picks up, where, and at what time. That framing misses what children are actually experiencing. At the moment of transition, a child often faces the highest concentration of stress in their entire post-separation life. Both parents are present, or at least emotionally proximate. Loyalty conflicts surface. Even parents who say nothing communicate volumes through body language, tone, and the emotional charge they bring to a parking lot or school pickup line. The logistics matter, but they are secondary to the relational reality a child is...
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082: AI in Divorce: What to Trust, What to Question, and What Could Hurt Your Kids–with Jamie Pima

Artificial intelligence is showing up in divorce cases at every stage, and most parents have no idea how to use it well or where it can quietly steer them wrong. In this episode, Krista Nash sits down with Jamie Pima, a former Morgan Stanley and Fidelity executive turned certified divorce financial analyst and founder of SecureSplit, who brings a rare combination of high-level financial expertise and firsthand experience with a difficult personal divorce. Jamie breaks down exactly how AI can serve as a research tool and co-pilot through the financial complexities of divorce, and where it becomes a liability. He and Krista also get into how parents can use AI to draft better co-parenting communications and build more thoughtful parenting plans. The tools exist. This episode is about learning to use them wisely. In this episode, you will hear: How AI is already reshaping divorce, from financial analysis to parenting plan drafts Why prompt quality determines whether AI helps or mis...
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081: The Most Stressful Part of Divorce for Kids (That No One Talks About) with Dr. Michael Saini

For most divorcing parents, the handoff between homes is treated as a scheduling detail. Dr. Michael Saini, professor at the University of Toronto and one of the leading researchers in high-conflict family dynamics, has spent years studying what actually happens to children during those moments, and the findings are hard to ignore. Krista Nash welcomes Dr. Saini back to the Children First Family Law Podcast for a conversation about his latest research, which examined 20 years of court cases to understand how judges, attorneys, and families are handling what he calls “changeovers,” and where they’re falling short. Dr. Saini’s research reveals that for many children, the transition between homes ranks among the most stressful parts of the entire separation experience, yet courts rarely address it in any meaningful detail. This episode offers a clear-eyed look at what children actually need before, during, and after each changeover, and why it deserves far more a...
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When Therapy Alone Isn’t Enough — Complex Family Systems and High-Conflict Divorce in Colorado

When a child stops wanting to see a parent, most people assume the solution is therapy. Find a good counselor, get the child into sessions, and let the healing begin. That assumption is understandable. It is also incomplete, and in the most difficult cases, acting on it without the right framework can make things worse. Complex family systems therapy is a different discipline entirely. It addresses the cases where estrangement has taken hold, conflict has calcified over months or years, and the standard therapeutic model simply does not fit what the family actually needs. Every Member of the System Has a Role The most common misconception in these cases is that the problem belongs to two people: the child and the parent they’ve pulled away from. In reality, the entire family system is involved. The favored parent, the extended family, even the attorneys in the room can contribute to the dynamic that keeps conflict alive. That means effective treatment requires participation from ev...
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080: Creating a Child-Centered Parenting Plan: How to Build Predictability, Peace, and Emotional Safety After Divorce

In this solo episode of the Children First Family Law® podcast, Krista explores one of the most essential tools for helping children thrive after separation or divorce—a thoughtful, child-centered parenting plan. Drawing from years of experience as a family law attorney, mediator, and parenting coordinator, Krista explains how clarity, predictability, and flexibility can create emotional safety for children during family transitions. She breaks down how to design developmentally appropriate parenting schedules from infancy through adolescence and explains why focusing on stability rather than strict equality best supports a child’s well-being. Krista also covers shared decision-making, communication strategies, managing holidays and vacations, handling new relationships, and addressing common pitfalls like technology use and “right of first refusal” clauses. Throughout the episode, she emphasizes that clarity is love, predictability is safety, and structure is one of the greatest gif...
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079: When Typical Therapy Isn’t Enough: Navigating Complex Family Systems, with Dr. Marlene Bizub

Some of the most difficult family law cases aren’t just high conflict — they’re entrenched. In this episode of the Children First Family Law® Podcast, Krista Nash sits down with Dr. Marlene Bizub, a Colorado psychologist specializing in complex family systems therapy, to examine the cases that most therapists won’t take and why that reluctance carries real consequences for children. Dr. Bizub brings years of experience working with families where parent-child estrangement has reached a critical level. She breaks down what this work actually requires: why every family member must be involved, why recovery is measured in months or years rather than sessions, and how labels like “alienation” and “narcissist” often cloud the picture rather than clarify it. This is a conversation every parent, attorney, and mental health professional in the family law space needs to hear. In this episode, you will hear: The difference between intentional parental alienation and protective behavior tha...
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The Words Co-Parents Use — and Why They Matter More Than They Think

Most co-parents going through separation focus on the big decisions — parenting schedules, legal agreements, who gets what. What they underestimate is something far more immediate: the language they use with each other every single day. The words that show up in a text message at 7 a.m., in a drop-off conversation, in a response to a scheduling request — these shape the entire climate of a co-parenting relationship, often more than any court order ever will. Co-Parenting Is a Job One of the most useful reframes for post-separation parenting is also one of the most practical: treat it like a job share. Two people, regardless of their personal history, have a shared professional obligation — to communicate, make decisions, solve problems, and resolve conflict around the needs of their children. The emotional intimacy of the former relationship is gone. What replaces it is something more structured: courtesy, professionalism, and a clear understanding of what the job actually requires. ...
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