Children First Family Law

Divorce may end a marriage, but it does not end the responsibility to raise a child together . We explore what parallel parenting really means when cooperative co-parenting feels impossible. Krista reframes parallel parenting as a way to reduce unnecessary conflict while still sharing essential information and supporting one child moving between two homes. We look at how chronic conflict harms kids, what children actually notice and internalize, and the subtle ways loyalty binds show up. Krista walks through strategies for calmer, businesslike communication, using parenting apps, structuring exchanges to protect children from tension, and drafting specific, child-centered parenting plans. We also touch on when added support can help, and how safety concerns and domestic violence change the analysis. In this episode, you will hear: What parallel parenting is and what it is not The “two train tracks, one train” analogy for co-parenting after divorce How chronic conflict and loyal...

Key Takeaways Parallel parenting is still co-parenting. You can put more distance between the adults, but you can’t step away from your shared responsibility to your child. Parallel parenting cuts unnecessary communication, not necessary communication. Medical, school, and emergency information, major activities, and significant changes still have to be shared. Chronic conflict harms kids more than two households do. Children pick up on tone, body language, and contempt, and they often feel caught in loyalty binds. Specific parenting plans reduce conflict. Clear terms for vacations, holidays, exchanges, and decisions build guardrails around the conflict instead of walls between parents. Parallel parenting is often temporary. The goal is whatever level of cooperation serves your child best, not a rigid label. Introduction When a divorce is full of conflict, the idea of never dealing with your ex again can sound like relief. That’s usually what parents picture wh...

Grandma has been raising her grandson for months. She feeds him, gets him to school, sits with him when he’s scared at two in the morning. Then a school secretary looks at his birth certificate, doesn’t see her name, and asks a question that stops her cold: are you his legal guardian ? In this episode of the Children First Family Law Podcast, Krista Nash talks with Colorado attorney Lisa Shellenberger, managing partner at Setter Roche Smith & Shellenberger, LLP, who practices at the intersection of domestic relations, juvenile law, and probate guardianship. Lisa and Krista walk through what happens when someone other than a parent needs real legal authority to care for a child, and why the wrong choice of legal path at the outset can cost a family months of unnecessary conflict. Guardianship and Custody Solve Different Problems Most family lawyers instinctively file in domestic court, the venue most people associate with divorce and custody. But as Lisa explains, tha...

Krista Nash welcomes back Dr. Karey O’Hara for this episode, following up on research first introduced on an earlier visit to the podcast. Parents going through separation or divorce are often told that conflict is bad for their kids, but Karey, a psychologist and researcher at Arizona State University, explains why that message misses the point. Karey and her team spent years studying children ages nine to twelve living through high conflict divorce, testing which coping strategies actually help and whether combining several works better than relying on one alone. The results surprised even the research team. One simple strategy, relaxation, outperformed the rest. Karey walks through what happens in a child’s body during parental conflict, what parents should avoid doing in those moments, and how a free program from her lab lets families put the findings into practice right away. It’s a hopeful, practical conversation for any parent trying to protect their kids am...

Krista Nash sits down with Colorado attorney Lisa Shellenberger, managing partner at Setter Roche Smith & Shellenberger, to talk through a corner of family law most parents never see coming until they’re standing in it. When a parent dies, disappears into addiction, or simply can’t provide safe care, the person left holding things together is rarely equipped for what comes next. Krista and Lisa unpack the real difference between guardianship and custody, why probate court can move faster than domestic court, and what happens when a parent gets back on their feet and wants their child returned. They also cover the constitutional rights every parent holds and how families can put protections in place before a crisis forces their hand. It’s a conversation built for anyone quietly raising a child who isn’t legally theirs yet. In this episode, you will hear: Why guardianship and custody solve two completely different legal problems for kids The 182 day rul...

Maintaining a child’s attachment to a parent with substance abuse issues can be a complex path to navigate. With advice from experts and keeping the child’s best interests first and foremost, parents and courts can successfully co-parent and maintain a healthy parent-child relationship. This episode of Children First Family Law is part two of Krista’s two-part series on navigating substance misuse issues alongside co-parenting in a divorce situation. While citing the research and expertise of  Dr. Stephanie Tabashnecke, Krista highlights the vulnerability of children in a family law case when a parent is struggling with substance abuse. She shares the underlying causes of this disorder and why understanding it can help both parents cope while keeping the child’s best interests at the forefront of their co-parenting conversations. You’ll hear why relapse is an expected part of struggling with this disorder, the top ten myths surrounding substance abuse, and how disrupting a child’s at...

Substance abuse is often used as a weapon in family court, even when there isn’t a significant problem. Courts have several ways of handling this issue, and each method can have long-term implications. In this episode of Children First Family Law, Krista explores how family courts determine whether a parent is safe with a child . She outlines her experiences with families dealing with these scenarios, implementing advice and expertise from psychologist and attorney Dr. Stephanie Tabashneck. Two previous podcast episodes, with guests Cheryl and Mike, explore both parenting sides of this situation. Krista offers an outline of the tools the court can use to evaluate a substance abuse issue and any additional risk factors. You’ll also hear the 10 factors the DSM-5 defines substance abuse. Together, these tools help attorneys and courts form parenting time recommendations. Substance abuse in a divorce scenario can be complicated. This episode is a guide for navigating substance abuse wh...

Understanding the Difference Between Parental Kidnapping and International Child Abduction One of the most frightening accusations a parent can hear during a custody dispute is, “You kidnapped our child.” For many parents, that word immediately creates fear about police involvement, criminal charges, or losing custody. However, the reality is more complicated. In many ordinary family law situations, a parent traveling with their child, visiting family, or taking a trip across state lines does not automatically constitute parental kidnapping. True parental kidnapping generally involves a situation where one parent takes a child in violation of another parent’s established legal rights, particularly when court orders or significant custody restrictions are already in place. The legal system treats these situations differently from international child abduction cases, which involve questions about multiple countries and international agreements. What Is the Hague Convention on Intern...

In this episode of the Children First Family Law Podcast, Krista sits down with the Honorable Judge Robert Lung to explore the nuances of family law. With decades of experience as a district court judge in Colorado, Judge Lung offers invaluable perspectives on how parents can work together to shape their children’s futures. This episode emphasizes parental cooperation in making decisions about their children’s lives rather than relying on a judge who lacks personal insight into their circumstances. Judge Lung discusses critical issues such as human trafficking, childhood trauma, and resilience. Drawing from his extensive work with various professionals, including military, medical, and law enforcement communities, Judge Lung underscores his commitment to these pressing topics through his roles on significant councils addressing human trafficking. You’ll hear Judge Lung recount his path from law school in Ohio to his current position in Colorado. Krista and Judge Lung high...

Why Education Planning Matters During Divorce When parents separate, the focus often lands on parenting time, child support, and the house. Educational needs quietly sit in the background, yet they can shape a child’s long-term future more than almost any other decision. For children with learning, behavioral, medical, or emotional challenges, school is often where stress shows up first. Ignoring education during divorce can leave a child without the structure and support they need to cope.   IEPs vs 504 Plans: What Is the Difference   A 504 plan comes from Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act. It gives a student access through accommodations, such as extra time on tests, preferential seating, or permission to take movement breaks.   An Individualized Education Program (IEP) is governed by the IDEA. It goes further. An IEP can change how a child is taught, track measurable goals, provide specialized instruction, and add related services such as school-based counseling. In simple t...

A parent taking a child on vacation is one thing. Crossing international borders without the other parent’s agreement is something else entirely. We explore where that line is drawn, why parental kidnapping is often misunderstood, and how the Hague Convention handles custody disputes that span multiple countries. Family law attorney Devon Rood Slovensky explains when parents are free to travel with their children, when legal restrictions begin, and why many situations people fear are “kidnapping” do not meet that standard. We also examine the Hague Convention through the high-profile Saeed Abedini case, where a young child was taken from Turkey to the United States, leading to a complex international legal fight. Devon shares how courts determine a child’s habitual residence, why acting quickly matters, and how delays can affect the outcome of a case. Along the way, we discuss the role of federal courts, the challenges families face when different countries are...

In this conversation, Krista sits down with special education attorney and expert witness LaTanya Moore, author of IEPs Made Easy: A Parent’s Guide to Special Education Advocacy. We unpack how education decisions during and after divorce can profoundly shape a child’s future. Krista and LaTanya explain why IEPs (Individualized Education Programs) and 504 plans are not just “school paperwork,” but critical tools that can either support or undermine a child’s ability to learn and thrive — especially when parents are in conflict. They clarify the legal framework behind IDEA and Section 504, what each plan actually does, and how to tell when a child needs more than simple classroom accommodations. Listeners will learn practical questions every parent and family lawyer should ask about a child’s educational needs, why early intervention matters, and how to reframe “labels” as access to support — not a life sentence. Above all, Krista and LaTanya urge parents and professionals to treat ed...